The triangle- is it "love connection" or just a 3-way-screw up? (Mayor Jenker, Chief Michael Spurgeon, City Clerk Shannon Spurgeon)

Well, guys and gals, just an observation here- but what is the deal with the connections between the "dynamic trio" consisting of Mayor Jenker, Chief Michael Spurgeon, City Clerk Shannon Spurgon)?

They rent from the Mayor a little trailer on highway 34 (Sycamore Street). They are paid by the City, which Jenker controls, which is obvious.

Shannon is paid by the City, as is Chief Spurgeon.

Shannon and Mike sit in the yard- Shannon sees a traffic violator (or thinks they are), tells Mike to go hop in the car and get them.. He waits till they get out of town, and then stops them. (Witnessed by a Bardwell Citizen)

Jenker drives around with a Schlitz in one hand and the steering wheel in the other (when he has his hands on the wheel).

As little as Bardwell is, the entire town knows Jenker is a drunkard, but hell, who cares when you control the police and the city clerk.

I don't know if it is illegal or not, but sure looks fishy, in a town with very few employees, you have a cop in charge, who is married to the "money taker" (who, as you can read below) isn't bonded.

Then you have Spurgeon who drives Jenker to other cities on non-Bardwell issues.

I don't know what ya'll think, but I think it could either be a triangle, or just a 3-way screw up. I mean, they all have issues. We get part time police protection, illegal activities in city hall, and a Mayor "who has yet to tame the blue bull". (FYI- a blue bull is the Schlitz logo)

Maybe the money that Shannon collects, or Jenker's own finances should invest in the Schlitz Malt Liqour company. Hell, he might even becom a millionaire, and buy the city, since he obviously controls it.

Here is something from "Modern Drunkard Magazine", which maybe we should give a complimentary subscription to Jenker:


Schlitz Malt Liquor Alcohol Content:5.9%

AKA: Blue Bull, Not My Fault Malt.

Reputation: Your pop’s malt liquor.Running amok and smashing shit like a bull in the delicate china shop that is your taste buds, Schlitz rushes in like a sweaty running back and finishes with a chemical aftertaste reminiscent of burning tires.

Aesthetics: The Bull is angry. He’s trapped against a wall. A white wall. To Schlitz’s credit, they don’t throw cheap adjectives like “premium” or “fine” on the label. All they feel the need to tell you is the name, alcohol content and size. What else do ya need to know, professor?

Jenker goes to the "Linebacker" store to buy, and doesn't even support our local merchants. Wonder where the blue bull's testicles are (or the one who drinks it and runs this town). Maybe we should all grow a pair and clean up city hall (if we don't have them, or if ours hasn't dropped yet) As for Chief Spurgeon, if were to arrest his boss, the Mayor, he would probably be evicted & Fired!